You’re Probably a Writer If…

Can you identify with writers’ perspectives, quirks, or various forms of madness? Go on–see how you compare. No one need know. 

You are probably a writer if:ID-10095691

  • You can provide, offer, suggest, recommend, propose a minimum of five synonyms for any word.
  • Your blood tests prove that for every part blood, there is one part coffee.
  • The two best compliments about your writing are, “I cried so hard” and “I lost sleep.”
  • Instead of talking to someone you want to get to know, you first consult their bookshelf.
  • No matter how upset you are at any time, something inside you says, “How would I describe this feeling? And how could I incorporate it in a story?”
  • Your conversation regarding the book you are reading features words like, “narrative voice,” “dramatic content,” “sentence structure,” and “third person, objective voice.”
  • The last person to use some of your favorite words was Shakespeare.
  • You mentally rewrite bad grammar.
  • Poorly written novels frustrate you to no end…and make you feel really good.
  • You lose your trust in your favorite authors when they violate point of view.
  • You know where the nearest pen is at any given moment.
  • You’ve ever lost your ability to speak, move, or blink when you’ve thought of a new plot idea.
  • The only print left on your backspace key is the B. And even that’s half gone.
  • You act out facial expressions, gestures, and noises when writing.
  • You’ve ever said “I’m a writer” as an excuse or much-needed explanation.
  • Some of your favorite stories and movies haven’t been written yet.
  • Your best friends aren’t real.
  • You have printed manuscripts on your bookshelf. They’re just stacks of paper tied with string, but that IS where they belong, after all.
  • People die in your head. And more often than you’d ever admit.
  • You know more about your characters than you do about your family or friends.
  • At 1:30 am, when you reread what you just wrote, you say, “Wow, did I write that?” At 1:30 pm, you say, “Good grief, I can’t believe I wrote that.”
  • You have such a reputation at word games that you can only play with people who have just met you.
  • You think about your book when reading someone else’s.
  • You’ve splashed soap suds all over the kitchen and couldn’t have been happier. After all, you figured out the perfect resolution to your climax AND kept your protagonist alive.
  • Reading novels is not very high on your list of relaxing things to do.
  • People tell you of their personal nemesis and you can’t help but think about the “bad guy’s” motivation, personal history, self-justifying internal dialogue, and character arc.
  • You talk to your computer screen. Often in more than one voice.
  • When scanning a bookshelf, you read author name, publisher, and title, in that order.
  • When you reread your writing and find misplaced punctuation, you think you’re a fraud.
  • Your fingers spend almost as much time on the keyboard as your forehead.
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4 comments on “You’re Probably a Writer If…

  1. Tiffany Rott says:

    This post resonates so much! Yes, just yes!

    Like

  2. Sara Lewis says:

    Yes to all! (Except I don’t drink coffee. Weird, right?)

    Like

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